Monday, September 15, 2008

victims don't fulfill dreams

Just sitting here this morning thinking about Joseph's fulfilled dream and realizing just how much he had in his past that he was able to move on from and let it stay in the past. If his future was a dream, then his past was a nightmare. Abuse, abandonment, betrayal, false accusation, you name it. He seems to have had an amazing ability to survive, heal, and dream on.

Without minimizing any one's past, it is significant to note that many want to use the hurts of years gone by to excuse themselves from the future. They no longer dream and work hard to pursue it. They rehearse and nurse old wounds, medicate pain and maximize comfort. Not Joseph, he overcame and became the person he dreamed he would.

How did he do that? A lot could be said, but one thing is for sure, he resisted having a victim mentality. Never feel sorry for yourself!! The past may be filled with emotional pain and you can remain in this pain for your whole life if you choose. It will only cause you to gain many more personal problems, simply because you will be so busy being a constant victim. Unconciously some ruin many opportunities of happiness to keep on being a victim of life, a victim of everything.

Victims spend key relational moments trying to get people to feel sorry for them. They unwittingly sabatogue thier dreams thinking that that others feeling sorry for them is somehow healing balm. In reality it only creates more distance between them and others. People do not have confidence in "victims". Having dreams fulfilled depends so much on the help of others but sympathy or even empathy is not the help that people who live in self pity need.

At some point, with God's help we must decide once and for all to stop feeling sorry for self and adopt an overcomer mindset. We may not even need months of counseling to do this. Some of us simply need to be told that we can think differently, others need to be told to "just do it".

Mindset of Winner: 1. What have I got; 2. Makes thing happen; 3. How can I become; 4. Looks at the positive; 5. Finds ways; 6. Acknowledges responsibility; 7. Takes guidance; 8. Sees always wins ahead; 9. Listens more; 10. Creates goals for him/herself; 11. Learns from mistakes; 12. Forgives; 13. Long distance runner, patient; 14. Favors.

Mindset of Victim: 1. What havent I got; 2. Waits for things to happen; 3. Why cant I?; 4. Focuses on the faults; 5. Finds excuses; 6. blames others; 7. Knows all; 8. Sees always loses ahead; 9. Talks more; 10. Creates obstacles for him/herself; 11. Loses from mistakes; 12. Holds a grudge; 13. Short distance runner, burns out; 14. Blames.

May we not be defeated by living in the painful past. May we embrace a God who heals, strengthens, and fulfills our dreams.

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